The Not Fake News Update, 27 April 2020

A lot’s been happening while half of us are stuck at home and the other half working overtime.  Here’s a brief list:

– President Donald Trump, fed up with having his remarks either misinterpreted or properly understood (depending on who you ask), has decided to stop speaking during the afternoon medical briefings.  Instead, he’ll be focusing on the economy.  Needless to say, the press is aghast at the damage he might do.  There’s just no pleasing some people, is there?

– Speaking of COVID-19, there’s anecdote showing that younger people are dying of strokes while testing positive for the virus.  Some doctors believe this is a new and unique way the virus can kill us; others are pointing to the enforced inactivity of America’s new lifestyles.  There are, however, confirmed reports of some otherwise healthy people who had the H3N2 influenza last year –or– the flu shot, and then experienced a massive reaction to a COVID-19 infection.  And there are some who didn’t have the flu but still went through a cytokene storm — or, curiously, excessive spontaneous clotting.  I asked the CDC; they didn’t reply.  Perhaps they’re busy with something.

– And speaking of people not replying to me:  WalMarts all across Texas are drawing the ire of patrons and residents by refusing to sell food seeds and gardening supplies.  Whereas store managers are blaming the Federal government (I called and checked), neither the Feds nor the state has released guidance suggesting home gardening is anything other than essential.  However, Pennsylvania and Michigan both did, and have gotten a ton of flak for it — as is WalMart’s regional management in Texas, which apparently issued the order spontaneously.  A press inquiry got me nothing more than an automated response.

– Remember how the civil war in Yemen ended thanks to the virus?  The rebels have now declared independence again, taking their little square of land and thumbing their noses at the internationally-recognized Yemeni government.  The Saudis support the government; the UAE supports the Rebels; nobody seems to care what happens to the people.  Business as usual, in other words.

– After more than a year of parliamentary stalemate, Israel has reached a deal for the two leading contenders to share power.  Netanyahu, the incumbent, will take the first turn; Gantz, the challenger, will take the second.  The courts are already being petitioned to block the deal given that Netanyahu is presently under indictment.

– The “Lost Apple Project” has announced the rediscovery of ten apple cultivars until recently thought to be extinct, all in a single season of effort.  This is one of several groups preserving antique apple varieties, but it’s the only one that focuses on America’s west coast.

– Bangladesh has refused to even acknowledge the existence of hundreds of Rohingya refugees fleeing Myanmar on decrepit fishing boats, much less allow them ashore.  A regular flood of Rohingya has been arriving in Dhaka for weeks; many are drowning, starving, or otherwise dying while in the harbor, some while swimming for land.  Meanwhile, an unknown group has successfully attacked the Myanmar military headquarters in the Shan State.

– Iran’s Revolutionary Guard has successfully deployed its first military satellite.  This is an organization distinct from the national military or space administrations, somewhat similar to the SS and SA of 1930s Germany, and nominally reporting to the country’s chief religious leader without any other government oversight.  Nobody seems to know what’s on the satellite.  Curiously, this comes a week after Russia’s most recent anti-satellite missile test.

– Thanks to the Coronavirus, Caporegime Vincent “Vinnie” Asaro of the Bonnano crime family has been granted compassionate release from prison, unlike Epstein, who is still dead.  Asaro’s conviction was for ordering a car burned that had cut him off in traffic, engaging through cutouts Gotti’s grandson to perform the job.

– The NFL has successfully held the weirdest draft in their history, the first-ever “Virtual Draft”, after their live venue in Las Vegas was forced to exclude them thanks to social distancing regulations.  We’re told that the event has gone off without a hitch over the past few days, but not every draft pick has been announced yet.  Ah, well.

Other stuff has happened, but we here at The Not Fake News either don’t know or don’t care.  We’ve got other things to worry about, like whether or not to change out of these comfy pajama pants in order to take out the garbage.

Actually, this isn’t true.  If there’s something we missed in this update, please do let us know in the Comments.  Or, to really draw our attention, you could always send us money using the button below.  The Not Fake News operates largely on your donations, so it’s a darn good thing I enjoy ramen noodles.


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