If watching the news gets you down, but you feel (rightly) ashamed of yourself for getting most of your information from Trevor Noah, Twitter, and Facebook, you’re in luck. Here’s the latest guilt-free info dump from The Not Fake News, aimed to make you feel less stressed in these fraught times.
So sit back, relax, and let the guilt fade as you learn more about the world around you than any ten minutes of CNN could ever provide.
– Journalist, brilliant scholar, and driven seeker of truth Dr. Hisham al-Hashemi was assassinated outside his home by militants, presumably as an intimidation tactic against other scholars who also condemn them. Meanwhile, missiles continue to fall on Baghdad’s Green Zone, and the Iraqi government has proved unable to prosecute or even detain Iranian-backed forces caught red-handed trying to launch more rockets.
– Russia has amended its constitution in order to permit two more Putin terms and ban same-sex marriage, among other sweeping changes. Despite pervasive ballot-box stuffing, voter intimidation, and corruption of poll monitors, two provinces had unaccountably failed to vote in favor until a recount was held. Curiously, no referendum is needed to change the Russian constitution. (I’m unable to think of an ironic comment that would do justice to this without violating Godwin’s Law. -Editor)
– In Cambridge, historian David Starkey was forced to resign from his honorary fellowship at Fitzwilliam College after making remarks on a YouTube podcast. The offensive statements included clarification that slavery and the Holocaust are different things, that BLM protests in Great Britain (as opposed to America) have been largely characterized by violence and imagined victimhood, that pulling down statues and cancel culture is deranged, and so on. The podcast has since been edited (as it should have been before release) so TNFN is unable to judge on alleged racist statements save to say we’re opposed in general, but we did greatly enjoy the lecture.
– The U.S. Navy is presently conducting exercises in the South China Sea using two full carrier groups, in response to the apparent removal of the separate governmental status of Hong Kong. In addition, the Trump Administration has sent notifications to Congress and the United Nations with respect to the intent to formally withdraw from the World Health Organization in support of Taiwan. Meanwhile, Indian forces are reportedly remaining at full vigilance after an announced Chinese withdrawal from their border has apparently not taken place.
– The president of Brazil has been diagnosed with COVID-19. In a press release, he says he feels fine, and is relying on the curative powers of the remarkable Brazilian immune system combined with hydroxychloroquine for his treatment and recovery. We here at TNFN wish him good health and a speedy recovery.
– Even as rising Coronavirus cases begin to swamp state healthcare systems, the Trump Administration has asserted that schools only remain closed for political reasons, and is pushing for reopenings this fall. In Pakistan, daily cases have dropped, perhaps because testing programs have been cut, but possibly it’s vice-versa. Meanwhile, in Bayonne, France, bus drivers are refusing to go to work after one of their colleagues was bludgeoned into brain-death for mandating mask use by his riders. (If this all seems insane to you, you’re not alone. -Editor)
– UPDATE: We’re informed post-press that the new USMCA took effect last week and got no press at all. It’s a tremendous step forward, representing a long-needed modernization of NAFTA with respect to intellectual property rights and eCommerce that didn’t exist back in the 90s.
– THIS JUST IN: San Francisco council proposes CAREN Act, imposing criminal penalties for calling 911 over matters of racial bias. Simultaneously hilarious and terrifying.
Doubtless other things have happened; we’re aware of a few and are holding them for longer feature articles once we know a bit more. Still, if you know of something we should have mentioned, please say something in a comment.
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