Editor’s Note: This is another in our new series of guest columns on current events. Once again, here’s the infamous Rudyard “Duke” Milhaus, of the Sports Desk .
Huddle up, gather round, people!
There’s a new playbook being used. It’s not the prettiest set of plays ever to hit the field, but the Opposition started it and now everyone’s picking up on it, so we’re gonna have to learn it too. It’s called the “Fake News Play”.
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“The Fake News doesn’t tell the truth.”
-President Donald Trump, CPAC speech, 24 Feb 2017
Once again, President Trump spoke out against the Fake News, this time at the CPAC conference at National Harbor. To be fair, it sounded a lot more powerful when he was talking. It sounded impressive, deeply meaningful, profound even. And then I read the words.
Trump sounds great in person. When you’re watching him with an open mind, he’s an incredibly powerful speaker — but he doesn’t say much. He’s a skilled orator who uses a third-grade vocabulary to convey simple ideas and make them seem powerful.
The comparison has been made (more…)
Editor’s Note: This is another in our new series of guest columns on current events. Rudyard “Duke” Milhaus of the Sports Desk is well-known for his passionate commitment to objective journalism. That we’re publishing his lovely and perfectly neutral article has nothing whatsoever to do with that large-bore handgun he keeps fiddling with.
What’s all this obsession we suddenly have with Russia? Why is the media being so critical of them? This is a country that not too many years ago I remember watching as we cheered their peaceful revolution, watched them embrace democracy and capitalism — and now we’re supposed to hate them?! The new administration apparently wants to get along with them — what’s the matter with that? (more…)
(NOTE: This article is being written in advance of the new Executive Order designed to function in place of that order of 27 January which has been partially blocked by the 9th Circuit. It is designed to be predictive in nature. When the new order finally is released, expect to see this updated with comparisons, but I’ll try to leave my predictions intact so you can see how smart I am — or how foolish, just as the case may be. The new order has now been released; comparisons are in a separate section at the end of the article.)
One week after taking office, President Trump released an executive order banning travel to this country on certain passports. I’ve written extensively on the pros and cons of accepting refugees, on the ways the ban went horribly wrong and why, and on the justifications for that ban. Combining that with the decision of the 9th Circuit to block some of its implementation, we should be easily able to predict what’s about to get ordered. (more…)
For me, the trouble with writing about politics these days is that it’s too easy to say bad things.
I don’t mean that it’s easy to insult the President and his people. That’s always easy. It’s always been easy, truth be told, which is exactly why the media always does it: They meet their deadlines and win Pulitzers and can still make Happy Hour, and (more…)
Ladies and gentlemen, I’ve got news for you: There is no news.
Last week, President Donald J. Trump held a press conference. Everyone’s watched it, commentated on it, annotated it, and shown clips, but for the benefit of those few people with the good sense to change the channel when they saw it coming, here’s a summary: An hour-long angry rant about fake news and illegal leaks. (more…)
Editor’s Note: This is our very first guest column, from a brand-new member here at WordPress. Rudyard “Duke” Milhaus will be manning our Sports Desk here at the only true source for unbiased news on the Web. I know I can count on you all to make him feel welcome.
So, let’s talk about football, that game where one side tries to move a ball over the other side’s goal line. A game of military precision, where it’s brutal, and quite frankly damaging to the players. In modern football, there are pads to deflect the blows and minimize the damage done, but injuries still happen from time to time. (more…)
I’ve been resisting it for days, but — Jeez, America! Are you all really this stupid?
Now, I’m going to start off by saying that I’m not a fan of Donald J. Trump, especially as president. But he is, in fact, president, and he got there by having a very clever team drive the media cycle. So it shouldn’t come as a surprise when he does it after he’s in office, should it?
But no; you’re all missing it. From the Times to the Post to CNN all the way to Fox News, major media is missing it completely. It’s the same damned slow curve they’ve been pitching for seven straight innings this series, and everyone still swings and reaches… and misses. (more…)
My cousin died. He was probably the third-best liar I’ve ever known.
Understand that when I say this, I’m paying one of the highest compliments I know how to, but he’d have probably only accepted “storyteller”, and then only if he thought I’d argue the point. He was one of the best; never drew one out too long, and always good for a laugh. Reminded me always of his father, who I adored. (more…)
(Editor’s Note: The entire editorial staff is far too wasted from our staff V-Day party right now to do any actual editing. I’m the last man standing and I don’t get paid overtime, so to hell with it. I’m just going to put this out as-is, with the notes from the Legal Department tipped in. They should know what they’re doing; otherwise we’re paying them too damn much. -JW)
Happy Valentine’s Day, Big Oil! You can now pay bribes again!
I want to start off right now by saying that I’m not against bribes at all. In fact, I’m so pro-bribe I’ll make it easy for you: Just send me your money and I’ll accept it with a clean conscience. I don’t care if you’re Big Oil, Big Tobacco, Big Shampoo, or the Illinois Nazis Peace Through World Conquest Foundation — I’ll take your money, cash your check, and smile the whole time.
Corruption is a time-honored tradition, and it’s as American as apple pie. (more…)
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